Thursday, June 30, 2016

A New Beginning


I had to put the UK series on hold to make way for this entry. There is actually a lot of things I want to write about and honestly, I wish I hadn't stop blogging for the past years because now, I would like to see how much I grew during my university years. It could be blamed on the lack of efforts and time management, or simply too much laziness.

While I don't quite disagree, the real reason why I decided to stop blogging all over is because as I grow older, writing about anything that comes to mind feels rather unnecessary and risky. This might sounds biased to some as I rant a lot on Twitter. That's it. Maybe it is more safe to say that I found another platform for me to rant with less words involve. Although I am also no longer at that point of life where I can openly express myself and not expect any consequences.

Thus, I'll take this current effort of mine as a new beginning. 새로운 시작!

Being 25 years old and fresh out of university... I admit that I am more vulnerable now than ever. As I read tons of my previous posts, I wonder to myself if I will ever be able to write such quality content again. Will I ever be the same? I matured, throughout the years, sure, but I am curious to know how my current state of mind, my perspective, the way I think, the way I perceive, will affect my writing. I am now, more comfortable writing in English than in Bahasa although I can assure you that my spoken and written Bahasa are still up to par. Sastera is still my forte. It's just that I am more comfortable arranging my thoughts in English.

As my result of SPA interview has come out, and alhamdulillah, I passed (so are my batchmates)-- the reality is creeping its way in. If I ever received the appointing letter some time after Eid, I will have to report my duty as a House Officer (junior doctor in training) around middle of August. Which is terrifying! Today is already 30th of June!

What am I going to do with my life? Am I prepared to be a competent doctor? Frankly, I've asked that question to myself since my clinical years. Alhamdulillah those thoughts didn't lead me to give up on my medicine course. I could not imagine myself being anything else other than a doctor. Cheesy, that I know. I hope when things get rough later on during my housemanship, I will always be remembered by this reason.

I am strong enough, I am capable to handle all the stressful environment and heavy workloads. It is also not impossible to enjoy my work and be a happy HO! That's the dream. Being happy while being a doctor.

I can do all that and I will!
One other note, have I reached quarter of life crisis?

Love, N

Monday, June 27, 2016

60 Days of Summer in UK (Part 3)

I could have wrote the title as Summer in Manchester, but why did I chose to write it as UK in general? That is because... I had the privilege of travelling to other places on the weekends! *fireworks and shooting stars* You see, I busted myself off during weekdays by working in the hospital and it's a given that since I'm already in Manchester, why don't I travel to other places as well, right? *grins*

So for the first 3 weeks, like a devoted daughter, I stayed at home on the weekends. My adventures began when my family came down to London to celebrate the Eidul Fitr with me! Yay! I took the train from Manchester Piccadilly to London Euston station. I arrived at 11pm, late at night, I know but I couldn't do anything about it as I only managed to get off work around 3pm and my train is at 7pm. I was a tad bit nervous honestly as that was my first time travelling alone to London via train. I've been on a flight alone several times before so I'm okay with flights. So after that, I took the Underground and alighted at Queensway station, where my mother and Ammar already waited for me outside the station. Hoorah!
Finally reunited with my mummy!
So usually for the past years, the tradition on the night of Eidul Fitr is-- final touch on home deco & savoring abundance of delicioso foods. This time around, we spent it by shopping at Bicester Village! (By far the best outlets I've ever been to. Cheshire Oak and JPO is no match).

My family and I, at Malaysia High Commission, London, after Eidul Fitr prayer. 
We basically spent the first day of Eid with sight seeing (and more shopping, obviously). We went to Harrods, and some other places that I couldn't exactly remember. Probably we went to Tower Bridge and Big Ben after that. Or not.

Harrods' teddy and I ♥

Based on this picture, I am finally aware that Harrods and Tower Bridge didn't happen on the same day. We went here after spent our morning at Portobello Market and Baker Street! A street market which sells quirky and antic things. This area also famous for the drama location of Notting Hill by Hugh Grant. Awww! Where's my Hugh Grant, though? Still no where in sight and to be seen. Hmmmm.

Did you notice something I wrote earlier? I went to Baker Street! And that associates with what? My heart-throb-- Sherlock Holmes! *inserts a perky high pitched voice* Yes, I was able to visit the Sherlock Holmes museum only on the third time of my visit to London. Gahhh, as an avid fan of Mystery and Crime genre, this feeds my soul. *glistening eyes*

I'll write more on my adventures, inshaAllah! Till then.

Love, N

Sunday, June 26, 2016

60 days of Summer in UK (Part 2)

So onto my days in Emergency Department of Salford Royal Hospital, Manchester. ED is hardcore and brutal. I had the privilege of having Dr Niamh Collins as my supervisor this time, an Irish lady doctor with so much passion in her work. Ahhh, I miss her!

My war zone.
My first day of ED, I had to tailed Dr Niamh everywhere she went as I need to familiarize myself with the surrounding. The above picture is a Resus bay (basically the place for patients with MVA, heart attack, stroke, major burns, fall from height and even seizures), then we have a Major HDU (patients with not so critical situations and can wait for treatment) and Minor HDU.
I miss those pandas :'( 
I was struggling to adapt with ED and blend with its people as my hands are rather limited of help. Bummer. Unlike Paeds, every specialists from other specialties came down to ED to review and give consult to patients that need their expertise. I met loads of inspiring doctors from Cardiology, Anesthetic, Gastro, Neuro and even Interventional Radiology! Hmm whenever the time permits, semestinya lah aku juga akan turut menyibuk di celah celah resus bay, tolong catit progress pesakit, ambil tekanan darah, temperature, tolong gunting baju, tolong angkat, tolong tolak katil untuk ambil xray dan CT scan. Aku juga turut menyibuk bertanyakan soalan soalan ke doktor hahaha.

If I am lucky that day, or when I am lucky to meet a doctor who is willing to teach, like Dr Papavasilleu, Dr Fiona, Dr Matthew Davenport or Dr Anthony, I will have the opportunity to actually clerk the patient first (by asking for their history from next of kin or the patient themselves) before presenting the case to the doctor-in-charged.

During those times, terasa bergunalah juga diriku ini.....

If during my Paeds attachment I was anxious to be home by 5.30pm, in ED, I even willingly stayed until 7.30pm before I decided to call the day off. Well, maghrib is at 9.45pm and I have no one waiting for me at home (except for my lil sister whom our daddy sent her to stay with me for a month) so there's nothing to rush.
Hi everyone, meet my new German friend, Caroline!
She was also an elective posting student attached to ED.
My batchmates from Mansoura Univ, Egypt with the Manchester Medical School administration on our farewell lunch :)

I must admit the 6 weeks attachment was a refreshing experience for me, in dealing with patients and giving insights on what kind of doctor I want to be later on in life. Through this opportunity, I also gained a lot of confidence that I didn't know I had it in me. Alhamdulillah, I am forever grateful. 

Love, N

Saturday, June 25, 2016

60 days of Summer in UK (Part 1)

I know it has already been a year since I had a blast summer in UK (which means I discard the idea of fasting and celebrating Eid in Malaysia last year). It's all started when my daddy suggested me to take up on the opportunity to do my compulsory elective posting in Manchester's hospital. It took me about a year of preparation as I had to underwent several procedures. First and foremost, I had to sit for the IELTS exam (similar to MUET in Malaysia) and alhamdulillah, I managed to get an overall score of 7.5 which qualifies me for the next step.

An interview with Prof Dr El Said was in due after that, but it was a funny one. As he went through the list of names of the students who applied to go to Manchester, he said: "Okay, I'm satisfied. All of you can go." I was like Whaaaat? That's it? I don't have to give lengthy reasons on why I must be chosen? Hahah, indeed, Allahu Taala made it easy for us. Then. the hard part came. I had to apply for a 4-tier Student Visa to enter UK as I'm not going there for leisure. Went all the way to Cairo in a 3-hours journey so I can have an interview with the British embassy. Again, alhamdulillah, it was a good via-Skype (uhuh, you read that right) interview with the British embassy officer. All there is left is waiting for my passport to be cleared.

Hmm can you imagine the agony of not knowing whether you can acquire your visa or not, and had to rely on faith alone when booking the flight ticket? The tension was horrible. I had too many things on my mind. Abundance of what ifs. Anyways, long story short. I got my visa and all was in due as planned. I boarded Lufthansa flight from Cairo to Manchester, with a 3 hours transit in Frankfurt. Killed my time in the airport as 3 hours didn't really allow me to explore the city more. I'll come back, Frankfurt. Do you copy?

I arrived in Manchester late at night, blessed to have my junior, Atifah whom was kind enough to pick me up at the airport alongside with her husband. After the long hours of travelling, I finally reached my so-called home for the upcoming 8 weeks. I rented a room from a Malaysian student in Manchester who went back to Malaysia for the summer-- receiving help from my dearest primary school friend, Maliha. Thank you so much, Maliha! You have been nothing but a savior:')

I was assigned to attach at Salford Royal Hospital, Manchester. Basically one hour bus ride from where I stayed and I even had to change buses to get to the hospital every morning before 8am. My first department is Paediatrics under the tutelage of Dr. Raja Syahanee (YES, a Malay lady doctor! Yay me). She is so awesome, in fact, the entire Paeds team at Salford are. She has worked in UK hospital for more than 10 years if I'm not mistaken. Her husband is an Oncologist, while her brother-in-law, Dr Nik is a Cardiologist working at the same hospital. Inspiring!

Myself, Dr Hanee and Mado, at Salford.
The fascinating thing about Paeds at Salford is, they do not have the in-patient ward. The place works as an ED (Emergency Department). They applied the four-hours rule there- from waiting, to be seen, to be managed and to be discharged. Any patients that require admission can stay in cubicles provided no more than 23 hours 59 minutes. If the patient requires additional care, he/she will be transported out and referred to another hospital.

My days at Paeds department isn't always eventful. Luckily Dr Hanee set up an amazing schedule for me and Mado to follow and thank you Allah for Mado! If not, I might as well be socially retarded in the ward and mostly, bored. At least I have someone whom I can annoy (Hahahaha). All the doctors are so generous and kind, I love how they interact with each other let alone with me. Manners, manners everywhere.

Fasting for nearly 20 hours and had to work at the hospital from 8am-5pm wasn't really that hard. Thanks to Allah for the strength and also... the typical UK weather! It was like winter in Egypt. I barely suffered. The challenge was to stay awake for sahur as I had my iftar at 9.45pm and Subuh was at 2.30am. Normally I would just eat a lot during iftar and skip sahur as sleep is far more important to me. I am not going to yawn every 5 seconds later at the hospital and looking dreadful. That will give me a bad impression to whoever saw it.

The best thing about Paeds was having the opportunity to go for CCN (Children's Community Nurse) session which is a community nursing aims at giving follow-up to the kids at home. For e.g those with rashes / wound / Diabetes. These community nurses will visit each patient's house and follow-up the kids health progress. It was certainly the highlight of my Paeds attachment.

I'll continue about my attachment at ED in the second part, inshaAllah.
Till then.

Love, N

Friday, June 24, 2016

The Sudden Urge.

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Gitu kan, tetiba dah terasa sangatlah kekok nak menulis. I thought I would never lose the perks to write here since the first day I decided to open up a blog in 2007. Tetiba dah jadi student medik, terlalu sibuk (kononnya), sampaikan dah terhakis elemen sastera dalam diri (gedik sangat please). Medical stuffs took away so much from me.

Dan alhamdulillah, setelah 6 tahun setengah bergelut dan berjuang, saya dah graduate! Hoyeah! So I am now an MBBCh degree holder. Takde apa nak dibanggakan pun sebab sampai sekarang pun masih menganggur. Hahah. I'm enjoying the bits and pieces as an unemployed lady, waiting to be posted in a hospital... somewhere. InshaAllah, please make loads of duaa for me yeah? If you ever wondered (hmm kalau lah, kalau), if I have given up on writing... the answer is NO. I am still fond of literature and languages. I write somewhere else, though. Thanks to Instagram, I am able to write lengthy captions alongside beautiful photos. HAHAHA.

So why the sudden urge?

I am actually planning for my last escapade before venturing into the career world, all on my own. So I read tons (literally heaps) of blogs to give me ideas on what to expect for my adventure. Huh. More like stealing people's tips and itinerary ;p I diligently read hundreds of blog posts so that I can be well-planned. Alhamdulillah, I'm done with my own itinerary. All there's left is to execute the plan! Now, upon reading all those blogs, a sudden urge came and I kinda found the passion again to re-open my own blog.

So tadahhh. I can't promise that I'll write often but I think this is a good start:) I sort of want to document my adventure here later inshaAllah. Till then.

Love, N