Thursday, September 22, 2011

seeds to harvest.

I plan to start afresh for my third year of medicine school. #hopeful. I plan to study harder than ever before, spending most of time in library, revising earnestly, inshaAllah. This seed of planning, I'm hoping that I can I harvest it by the time I lay my foot on Egypt.


Wednesday, September 21, 2011

She is such a pitiful girl.

I suddenly missed blogging everything regarding my thoughts. #likeaboss.

Looking back at how I started blogging in the year of 2007, I treated blogging as a platform for me to unleash my anger towards anyone whom I find annoyance with. I was THAT brave due to the fact that I know my blog won't be read by anyone I knew, except for Kartini Izreen (rindu please) since we came up with the idea of creating our blogs together :)

I missed writing anything my mind came up with and feeling satisfied for it.

I might actually missed the old me. Allah forbid, please. I don't want to remember anything regarding 2007 nor I want to have any memories from that year. 2007 was such a bloody year, to the point that I think I literally lost myself along the way and I find it hard to recognize who I was at that time. Pitiful, I know that.

And if I'm not strong enough, I'm afraid that I may lose myself for once and for all this time.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Just because.

These days whenever I clicked the 'New Post' button, I would either [1] staring the white box hopelessly hoping for something to came up so that I can ACTUALLY write something benificial for my investment in the Hereafter or [2] end up writing something half way, hit the 'Save Now' button and don't have the urge to continue writing it again anytime soon or worse, [3] typing all the things I had in mind and pitifully erase all the words later on. Blergh.


I am trying hard here to plant (?) a feeling of missing Egypt at least for a slightest bit that I dreamt I went back to Egypt without any of my suitcases :O Oh my Allah, THAT was such a horror thing to happened! My heart even races in my sleep!

Untuk kamu yang saya dah anggap macam my other half (THIS IS NOT REFERRING TO A GUY).

Duhai hati yang futur,
Kembalilah pada Tuhanmu,
Demi nyawamu yang ada dalam genggaman-Nya.
Sebelum kamu dikembalikan pada Ilahi.

P/s: Semua orang mencari esok yang pasti ada, tapi belum tentu punya kamu di dalamnya.

P/s part 2: Kita selalu fikir Allah Maha Pemurah... tapi kita lupa Dia juga akan marah. Hari yang Dia akan memalingkan wajahnya pada yang kufur adalah Hari Akhirat dan hari tu tak akan lama datangnya.

P/s part 3: Wanted to go to Ayie's place tonight for a get together with fellow ex-schoolmates but I am so darn afraid that I'll fall out of place. Just because.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

once in a blue moon.

Everyone have their very own circle of friends that can make you truly be yourself and still accept you for who you are :') The kind of friends that even if you are married and blessed with dozens of kids, you would still see each other once in a blue moon~

Who would have known being in the same class for two years consecutively in 2005-2006, made a study group for PMR, stayed back together doing exercises at the canteen everyday, and they are the ones I considered as friends for life and THIS IS FOR KEEPS! :')

Dalam saling mengejar cita-cita,
Moga ukhuwah tetap terasa~
Biar jasad ditelan usia!

Sayang antunna lillahi taala.

BieAnisAmaniRabieSyafaNuhaAinYatZahidah. ♥ Yang ini, biar tembus sampai syurga! InshaAllah.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

this is somewhat random.

I am kinda longing for a mojo to write but somewhat hesitates for some reason :) Pardon me for abandoning you maybe (?) I am not trying to make an excuse or reasoning just because I don't think I have one. Allah tarik nikmat untuk menulis agaknya :)

Raya yang hilang rasa, Aidil yang hilang seri, Fitri yang hilang jiwa.
Semua dah tak sama.

Mungkin Ramadhan saya ada terlalu banyak yang kurang di mana-mana. Mungkin.

I am trying to be plain here. Simply a plain girl yang orang lain tak ambil kisah atau tak ada rasa nak tahu apa-apa tentang dia. Invisible to anyone's eyes. I wanted to be that kind of girl. So help me please with a cherry on top? Ke kamu nak kepingan strawberry? :)

Takyah fikir sangat. Jangan fikir sangat. Biar lah awak terseksa asalkan orang tu bahagia :) Mereka tak faham dan kalau kamu pun tak ada kudrat nak kasi mereka faham kerana rasa hormat dan sayang yang masih bersisa, ikutkan saja :) Ikutkan.

You wouldn't lose a thing, I promise. Dengan izin Allah~

Hello Semester 5! Hello dunia medikal tahun tiga! :)

P/s: I have so many things in my mind that I had to combine them into bits and pieces. Tak faham tak apa~ May Allah Taala bless youuuuu. Yes YOU! :)